Paparazzi For Geeks

It must suck to be a celebrity. Every time you see them on TV or photographed in a magazine, they are always swarmed by paparazzi. Even Masi Oka has a small contingent of photographers following him once in a while.

There's an incredible demand for these paparazzi photos, mostly because normal folks want to see celebrities fall or be caught in compromising positions. Watching them trip over themselves or walk around without make up makes us feel like we're not any less then these glamorous stars, who are somehow superior beings because of their status. We really shouldn't need these photos to justify our existence, but somehow, it helps.

Until now, this feeling of justification was reserved for the TMZs of the world. Not any more! A new blog named PhotoshopDiasters has surfaced recently, citing surprisingly bad and often hilarious mistakes done by graphic pros. Photoshop geeks rejoice as press-release photos of a three-armed Beyonce are exposed, or a 6 fingered woman is used for the latest Grand Theft Auto ads.

Enjoy.

http://photoshopdisasters.blogspot.com/

Penalty Shots Are Stupid

Millions of people glued their faces to the TV screen yesterday as Chelsea took on Manchester United in the Champions League finals. The teams were evenly matched and the outcome was ultimately decided with penalty kicks. Man U are your 2008 Champions League... uh... champions.

It's really unfair for the game to end this way. Here are two of the world's best teams, both utilizing superior passing, conditioning, defence, team chemistry, and other elements to get to the finals. The champion was then decided on ONE single element of the game, penalty kicks, of which majority of the goaltender's chances of defending a shot is guessing where the shooter will place the ball. The team element is gone. The essence of the game is gone.

Hockey has recently (2005-2006 season) adapted to deciding a draw game on penalty shots as well; while understandably it is an easy solution to decide a clear victor, consider what happens if we applied this principle to other competitions:

• Rather then playing extra innings until a winner is decided, baseball will now hold a home run derby after the 10th inning.
• Rather then playing overtime, basketball games will now be determined by foul shots. Better yet, a slam dunk contest.
• If there's a tie in a golf tournament, it will be decided by a long drive competition. The person who hits it the furthest wins, best out of 5.
• Rashad Evans fought Tito Ortiz in UFC 73 and judges ruled a draw between the fighters. This could have been solved if they took turns trading punches in the face to see who loses a tooth first.
• The final contestants in spelling bees will now have a staring contest. Loser laughs first.

Penalty shots. Ridiculous.

Another Dailymotion Gem

Hillarious spoof on Christian music, bang on with the mannerisms and personalities. Love the Rick Warren tribute Hawaiian shirt...

Jesus People - Episode 1
Uploaded by jesuspeople

Dodgy Dodgy Gumdrops

The Great Job Hunt started again the moment I was finished with my gig at the promotions agency. Since then, I've interviewed with several head hunters and have interviewed with two companies. The first one, arranged for me by a headhunter last week, loved me, but unfortunately they were unable to hire someone on a contract basis. The other, an award winning design agency that I found on Gumtree, turned out to be a strangely dodgy experience.

Gumtree is an excellent public classified service for London and the UK, similar to Craiglist or Kijiji. The difference between Gumtree and these other classified services is that while it's free to browse, it costs someone £25 to post an ad. This ensures the quality of postings and that the person posting is actually serious about it. Looking for a job on Gumtree seemed like a perfectly good solution to my employment troubles, especially since I have a friend who's now very happily employed in a medium sized company that he found on the site. He found the job 3 days within his job search.

Sadly, my experience hasn't been nearly as good. Since March, I've secured 5 interviews via job postings on Gumtree and 3 via headhunters. The Gumtree interviews have all been with small companies, one of which hired me but didn't quite work out. My interview yesterday was the strangest yet, as the Director that interviewed me showed some very troubling signs:

• When I walked into the interview room, she didn't look like she was very happy to see me at all.
• She refused to tell me her name when we shook hands in the beginning, even refused to acknowledge when I said "oh, you must be Jacky". When the other person in the room interviewing me asked her if she introduced herself yet, she said that she'll do it later.
• She took my CV and totally destroyed it. By that I mean she folded it, crumpled it, wrote all over it. Thanks to her, I have to spend more money to reprint my CV and portfolio again.
• She kept showing signs of stress, which I really don't understand as *I* should be the one stressing out.
• She kept criticizing me in front of me, said she couldn't figure me out, and at one point even made a personal attacked on my employment choices. This was the first ever interview where I actually got mad at the employer. I didn't feel like I needed to defend my life against someone that I didn't know.
• When I asked about the job itself, the answer that I got was so generic and wishy-washy that I really don't think they knew what the job was themselves. This made me even more pissed as they demanded detailed answers from me but couldn't reciprocate when I asked for one from them.
• Half way through the interview, I had visions of me flipping the table over screaming "This interview... is OVER!". I just wanted to end it and go home. I have a feeling that she's worse then Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada.

On the other hand, the interviews arranged by headhunters were always very pleasant and all the jobs seemed to suit me well. I'm wondering if I should abandon doing my job search on Gumtree altogether and just wait for these headhunters to call me. Sounds lazy, but I don't want to spend £50 reprinting my CV everytime an interviewer finds a need to use it as a stressball.

Persepolis

A couple of weeks before my departure to London, I stockpiled on some movies in case I needed to kill time while job hunting. Within my pile was Persepolis, nominated for Best Animated Feature Film at the Oscars and based on a critically acclaimed graphic novel of the same name. It came highly recommended by a movie buff friend, and I was intrigued by the style of the movie and it's unique coming of age story. When I finally got around to watching it last week, I was all proud of myself because this movie had just started playing in London cinemas.


To my dismay, Persepolis was a French film and the copy I got was void of any English subtitles. There's an English dubbed version with the talents of Sean Penn and Iggy Pop, but this wasn't it. I decided to brave through it anyway, figuring that the stylistic animation will keep me from yawning and I'd be able to guesstimate the plot. I was right. The film was funny, witty, and at times disturbing. I got all that from not understanding a single word of the dialogue.


After watching the film, I bought the graphic novel to catch all the bits that I missed. As it turns out, Persepolis was a FRENCH graphic novel as well. Luckily, with the release of the film, I was able to easily find ample copies in English.


The book is a detailed autobiography of the author, Marjane Satrapi. Born and raised in war-torn Iran, her parents flew her to Austria for a better life. She later returns to Iran, only to find herself trying to readjust to a society that she no longer truly belongs in. The book feels like a diary, with snippets of memories that somehow all fit together. It also gives a very rare first person account of of what happened in Iran during that time.

For those who still think of comics as a medium strictly for superheros and jugheads, this book will change your perception in an instant. I'm convinced that Satrapi was able to tell her story far better with images then with just words alone. Her illustration style is very basic, all in black and white (not even a shade of grey), and it works very well in conveying her perception on her life's events.

I think I'm going to watch Persepolis (the movie) again, seeing how much I've missed in the dialogue. But this time, I'm gonna find it in English.

Summer for Spring

It's been getting pretty hot around here lately, hitting highs of 26 degrees. Just a couple of weeks ago, we were doing 12 and it actually hailed. I think we just skipped Spring altogether here.

With the heat comes a need to cool down, but I guess it's a concept that the English hasn't picked up yet. For the $4 you pay to ride the bus (if you pay cash... I suggest investing in an Oyster Card), you get NO air conditioning. That's right. There aren't even FANS. Is it so much to ask for some proper air circulation during the hot season? Hong Kong buses, practically identical to London buses, are fully equipped with a/c that will blast your face off. Toronto buses have a/c. I'm not suggesting that HK or TO does public transportation better, I'm simply noting that it's a basic feature EVERYONE ELSE seem to have.

I hear it's even worse in the Underground. There's no a/c there either, and it's even hotter then the buses with all the people crammed into the trains. My chinese mind goes crazy calculating how little value I'm getting for my $8 (again, if it's cash) trip in the tube.

As bad as I make it to sound, it's really a minor nuisance that I'm willing to put up with to be in this city. The sun was out for a full week and lit up this beautiful city. Football finals are on full tilt and there's excitement in the air. Summer music festivals are on soon as well... I can't wait to go into Hyde Park and listen to Eric Clapton for free. Well, they're unofficial "seats", and I won't be able to see Clapton or the screen. But I don't have the $80 for the ticket, so what's a poor boy to do? =P

Like zombies in Wales

Just returned from a quick visit to Cardiff, which is home to a beer called Brains. Naturally, we wanted some Brains. So we ordered it in a pub:

Bartender: "Hi, can I help you?"
Gav: "I'd like a pint of Brains Bitter please"
Bartender: "Sorry, but I have no Brains"

Indeed...